How do you know? (Love Edition)

The last 6 months of my life has been a roller coaster of emotions. It's always a battle between the mind and the heart. The "I think I'm better"or "I deserve better" with the "Help, I'm drowning!".

Today I heard some fighter jets flying very low in the sky, very close to me and several other people... and making a lot a very strong noise... twice. It was intense and a little scary. The kind of scrary that makes you question if your safe, if you should hide or just lay low...

It made me think of the "end of the world"... I know dramatic, right?! It made me think if today was the end of the world, who would I want to be with. Who would I want to hold my hand and who would I want to hold in my arms for that end? The name that came in my mind made me realize that the relationship I have been in for the last 17 years and my children are the only ones that matter in a situation that could be like "an end of the world type". That is how you know. Faced with a slight discomfort of facing your own end, questionning yourself of who you would want to face it with... It puts the difficulty in a relationship into perspective. It doesn't mean the road to recovery is over, but it means I know where I am headed. The road might be long, but it felt shorter in that glimpse of a moment where I thought this could be "IT", without the ones I trully love. The end of my life wouldn't be the same without those people.

Another event happened today, almost at the same place, a violinist started playing some beautiful songs to the public. At a top of a mountain, surrounded by the beautiful view of the city. Listening to his beautiful piece, it made me realized how lucky I am to have myself and how strong I have been. I was proud of the person I was becoming. I also caught myself in a moment of realizing I wanted to share this moment with my partner of 17 years. A moment of peace and gentle kindness. Sunlight, city view, gentle music playing and simplu living the moment in the present. I was happy to spend it on my own, but Ianothe rpart of me would have liked to have shared a portion of this moment with him. Share the love and peace that came in that moment.

What I mean to say is that life will provide moments that will make you realize what you want. Your intuition will guide you to your real being. Leave the mind behind for those moments. Let your heart guide you to your real self. It can only mean truth and magic.

Live your life for you, as no one else will. You are a beautiful soul that deserves kindness, love and be surrounded by all the signs life shows you. You only have to be attentive to them.

Love to you all!